The recent effects from the British Petroleum oil spill has already started to have devastating results. With the animals that have feathers or fur, the oil seems to be a bigger threat. The birds are losing body mass due to their systems trying to maintain the heat that is increasingly escaping as a direct result of being covered in oil. During this process, the birds are becoming less able to fish, drink, or even fly away. young and helpless seal pups are being turned away from their mothers because they are not recognized from the smell of oil on their fur, thus leaving them to starve and parish. Not only is this affecting birds and sea animals, but is is also having a profound ramification on aquatic life as well. The gills of fish and the blowholes of dolphins have a severe chance of becoming clogged. With these animals being affected, we stand to lose a good portion of our food source; along with many generations of wildlife having the inability to breed properly. With this much devastation, we need A Call to Action in the Gulf. We need to stand up for the helpless victims and take notice that their environment is deeply damaged and needs to be saved. "You can't rewind an oil spill but you can put a pause to the next one. Arctic Ocean drilling is a mistake for wildlife" is a quote from a blog by Larry J. Schweiger, whom is the current President and CEO of the National Wildlife Federation.
by Tanya Adams and Jacqueline A. Young
Resources:
www.amsa.gov.au/marine_environment_protection/educational_resources_and_information/teachers/the_effects_of_oil_on_wildlife.asp
http://blogs.nwf.org/nwf_view/
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Hey, this looks a bit familiar! I was wondering if anyone else would do a conclusion to the oilrig disaster! I like it :) It's structured very well, and I especially like the emotional details about the seal pups :( The call the action at the end is a good idea also, the only thing I would add is somewhere for the readers to go after they've read your article so they can take action. Other than that its wonderful!
ReplyDeleteI think that this is very well written and full of very imporant details and facts. For people who do not follow the news, such as myself are very shocked when reading your conclusion. I am almost out of words when hearing what this is doing to the birds, ocean life and other animals involved. It sounds like it could have an affect on our food source also. Very sad that they arent doing much better to solve this issue! Very well written!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with the others that posted a comment about your essay including very good details and facts. I have heard about this tragic situation through friends but they only give you choppy facts, not precise details like your essay. It helps us to know what has happened and what exactly went wrong so we don’t repeat it!
ReplyDeleteAlthough I really like your story and you provided sites for us to look at, it does not really seem like a conclusion paper. I think there were just too many detailed descriptions of what is wrong with the animals for the conclusion area of a paper. This is also where I am struggling with my own conclusion paper.
ReplyDeleteI thought that this was a good conclusion essay. The body flows into the conclusion like it should. Details are given to explain the final conclusion. The concluding quote I thought was perfect for this essay. The only thing I would change is the environment because you are talking about mammals and marine like. Other than that I thought it was great.
ReplyDeleteI think this is a pretty good conclusion with all the elements. The ending is a bit awkward--I'd mention the source before the quote and then end with the quote, not the source--but this is otherwise a very good effort.
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